What does God say about divorce in Malachi 2 — and why? "For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce" — Malachi 2:16 contains one of the most direct statements in all of Scripture on the covenant of marriage. But the passage is about far more than a rule; it is about what it means to make and keep a covenant in the sight of a covenant-keeping God. In this sermon, Dr. Toby Holt examines what God was condemning in Malachi's day, what "the wife of your covenant" means, and what this passage teaches about the sanctity of marriage and the grace that is still available to those who have failed.
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Questions This Sermon Answers
Malachi 2:10 opens with: "Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Why do we deal treacherously with one another by profaning the covenant of the fathers?" The connection is explicit — faithfulness to God and faithfulness to covenant partners are inseparable. A man who is unfaithful to his wife is demonstrating the same spiritual disorder that makes him unfaithful to God. The two covenants — divine and marital — mirror and reinforce each other.
"Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant" (Mal. 2:14). Marriage in the Old Testament is a covenant — not a contract or a social arrangement, but a binding, solemn commitment before God. The phrase "wife of your youth" emphasises the long-term, covenantal nature of the relationship: she is the woman you chose when you had your whole life ahead of you, the one who has shared your journey. To abandon her is not just interpersonal failure — it is covenant violation.
The text (in Hebrew) is difficult, but the most established reading — confirmed by the Septuagint and quoted by Jesus — is that God hates divorce. This is not a statement that divorced people are hated by God, but that the act of divorce — the breaking of a solemn covenant — is contrary to God's design and character. Jesus confirms this in Matthew 19:8: "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so."
The most likely context, consistent with Nehemiah 13:23–27, is that the men were divorcing their Israelite wives to marry pagan women from surrounding nations — a practice driven by social advancement and intermarriage with more prosperous neighbours. This is why Malachi addresses both faithless divorce (2:14–16) and marriage to "the daughter of a foreign god" (2:11) in the same passage. The wives abandoned were the covenant wives of their youth, replaced for social or economic reasons.
Malachi 2:13 — "You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and crying; so He does not regard the offering anymore, nor receive it with goodwill from your hands." God refuses their worship because they are treating their wives with covenant treachery. This is consistent with Jesus' teaching in Matthew 5:23–24: "If you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and first be reconciled." You cannot offer acceptable worship to God while treating covenant partners with contempt.
Marriage is a covenant made before God, characterised by companionship, faithfulness, and permanence. It reflects the relationship between God and His people — a covenant He does not break even when Israel proves faithless. Paul develops this typology fully in Ephesians 5:22–33, where the husband's love for his wife is modelled on Christ's love for the church — sacrificial, persevering, covenantal. The high view of marriage in Malachi is the foundation for the New Testament's equally high view.
The Westminster Confession 24.5–6 teaches that adultery and "such wilful desertion as can no way be remedied" are the only grounds on which divorce is permissible, and that the innocent party may remarry after a lawful divorce. The Confession upholds the permanence of marriage as the norm while acknowledging pastoral exceptions. This reflects the balance in Scripture between God's ideal (one man, one woman, for life) and His provision for hardness of heart in a fallen world (Matthew 19:8).
Malachi 2:15–16 ends with this double exhortation. The faithlessness Malachi condemns begins in the spirit — in the inner life of a man who has stopped loving his wife, who has begun to see her as a burden rather than a covenant companion. The command to guard the spirit is a call to tend the inner life of love and commitment before the outward act of faithlessness occurs. Reformed spirituality has always understood that sanctification works from the inside out — guarding the heart is the first and most important work.9. How does the Reformed tradition understand marriage as a covenant rather than a contract?
1. Marriage as Covenant — not Contract
Malachi 2:14 uses the word "covenant" (Hebrew: berit) to describe marriage — the same word used for God's covenants with Noah, Abraham, Moses, and David. This is not casual language. A covenant is a binding, solemn commitment with God as witness, sealed by oath. The Westminster Confession 24.1 describes marriage as a covenant instituted by God, and Reformed theology has consistently held that its permanence and fidelity reflect God's own covenantal character. You cannot be cavalier about covenant — with God or with your spouse.
2. The Theological Grounding of Sexual Ethics
The reason God hates divorce is theological, not merely moral: it violates the covenantal structure built into creation and reflects a disordered soul. Jesus grounds His teaching on divorce not in Mosaic law but in creation: "from the beginning it was not so" (Matthew 19:8). Reformed ethics grounds all sexual ethics in the created order and the divine image — not in cultural norms, not in therapeutic categories, but in the God who made man male and female for each other in permanent covenant.
3. The Inseparability of Worship and Ethics
God's refusal to accept the offerings of men who are faithless to their wives (Mal. 2:13) establishes a non-negotiable connection between how you treat people and how your worship is received. This is consistent across Scripture: Isaiah 1:15 ("Your hands are full of blood — I will not hear"), Amos 5:21–24 ("I despise your feast days"), and Jesus in Matthew 5:23–24. Reformed worship is not ritual separated from life — it is the expression of a whole life offered to God, which includes covenant faithfulness in the home.
4. The Text: Malachi 2:14–16 (NKJV)
"Yet you say, 'For what reason?' Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant… 'For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one's garment with violence,' says the Lord of hosts. 'Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.'"
Continue studying: explore the full Book of Malachi sermon series, or browse the complete Reformed Sermon Archive.

About The Speaker: Dr. Toby Holt serves as the third President of New Geneva Theological Seminary (Colorado Springs, CO), founded 1993. An expository preacher with over 1.9 million sermon downloads on SermonAudio.com, Dr. Holt brings over 17 years of pastoral experience to his verse-by-verse Bible teaching. New Geneva offers fully online, Westminster Confessional theological education — M.Div., Th.M., D.Min., and other degrees.
Summary. In this sermon on Malachi 2:10-16, Dr. Toby Holt of New Geneva Theological Seminary teaches that marriage is a divine, covenantal institution created by God to typify Christ's faithful love for the church, and that infidelity and covenant-breaking are not mere indiscretions but treachery against a covenant God witnesses and judges. From a Reformed perspective, he explains that because God created marriage He alone sets its rules, that God hates divorce yet permits it under strict circumstances such as infidelity, and that the gospel offers repentance, reconciliation, and cleansing to all wounded by broken relationships.
The Pain and Glory of Marriage as a Divine Institution
Is your marriage hurting or broken? Have you gone through or are you considering divorce? In today's study from Malachi 2, we'll hear what the Bible has to say on these topics. This text this morning is honestly one of the most difficult to preach and the reason why is because of how many folks it impacts.
So I've done enough pastoral counseling to know this, that there are few pains as acute as the trauma that one can experience in a broken relationship. There are few pains as acute to the human heart as the pain we can go through, the trauma we can suffer through a broken or fractured relationship with a spouse.
On the flip side, as that is true, there are few joys as wonderful. There's few joys as wonderful as the joy of two spouses who are growing together over the years in their relationship with one another and their relationship with Christ. See, marriage, if we look at it briefly here in the abstract, good golly, marriage is a wonderful thing.
Marriage is the institution that God has chosen to typify the love that Jesus has for the church. Marriage is something far greater than just a human institution. It has spiritual implications. Marriage is something that God esteems.
Marriage is something that God created. Marriage is something that God loves because it has a covenantal structure. The love, the devotedness, the faithfulness between two spouses. That typifies the love, the covenant, the faithfulness that God has with His people.
Marriage is a special union. It's something to be encouraged by and it's something that as we study it, that we can see, we can see the joy that God has in it. Even if sometimes we look at our own lives or the world around us and we see the pain of broken marriages or fractured or hurting marriages.
Continue reading the full transcript 32-minute read · 14 sections · every section links back to the audio
The One Vulnerability of Marriage: The Sin of Its Participants
Marriage is a wonderful thing, but it has one vulnerability. It has one vulnerability. See, our problem with marriage is that it is never isolated from sin. Our problem with marriage, as great as it is as an institution, it is not isolated from the sin of those who partake in it.
The common denominator behind every divorce, the common denominator behind abuse, the common denominator behind infidelity, The common denominator behind all these things is the sinful disposition of marriage's participants. The sinful disposition of the spouses. In other words, if one's marriage is on the rocks now times past or in the future, the problem is not primarily a compatibility issue between the two spouses.
It's primarily this, a compatibility issue with the divine institution and those who partake in it. There's a wise man who put it this way. A wise man said that sin is the cause and the cosigner behind every divorce, behind every infidelity. It's the silent partner to every argument, silent partner to every fight.
It's the instigator of our infidelities and the like.
Infidelity and Intermarriage: The Covenant Crisis of Malachi's Day
Now, speaking of infidelity, that is one of the key concerns of Malachi. That is one of the key concerns in today's passage. You see, infidelity, illicit relationships that break the covenant between a man and a woman, this is a problem that's not new. It's not a problem just in the 21st century or the 20th century and the like.
It's a problem that has occurred throughout the generations, and it was especially prevalent in the time of Malachi. You see, Malachi's contemporaries, they looked out at the pagan nations. They looked out at the daughters of the pagan nations, and they lusted after them. And they pursued them.
And they intermarried with them. And this was problematic. And the reason it was problematic is because when they did so, they were polluting and diluting the faith which they had been entrusted with. Because with the foreign wives came the foreign gods, came the foreign practices.
So in Malachi, God is going to call out His people and is going to say, you have lust for the wives of foreign nations. And you do not know what that is doing, what that is doing to the people and to your progeny. And so God calls him out. And three times in today's text, as we'll see, He's going to use the strongest term imaginable to do so.
He's going to use the term treachery. You see, pursuing a spouse that is not one's own, or pursuing those spouses out of accord with God's will and decree for your life, is a form of treason because it violates a covenant that God has with His people. Now, in our day, the covenantal aspect of marriage doesn't carry a lot of weight for folks.
But it does with God, and that's what we're seeing in today's text.
Treachery Against the Covenant of the Fathers
“Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Why then do we deal treacherously with one another by profaning the covenant of the fathers?”
— Malachi 2:10 (NKJV)
If you would, let's look at verses 10 through 12, and then we will work our way through the passage. Chapter 2, verse 10 says this, Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Why then do we deal treacherously with one another by profaning the covenant of the fathers?
Judah has dealt treacherously and an abomination has been committed in Israel. He's not pulling any punches here. This is not a velvet hammer he is using. He's picking the strongest terms imaginable because this is the strongest issue of his day.
Judah has dealt treacherously and an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem for Judah has profaned the Lord's holy institution. Not merely wrinkled his nose at it, not merely forgotten it or pushed it aside, but profaned the holy institution which God loves in that he has married the daughter of a foreign God.
May the Lord cut off from the tents of Jacob the man who does this, being awake and aware, and yet who brings an offering to the Lord of hosts. Let me ask you a thinking question here as we're near the start of the sermon. The thinking question is this.
God Created Marriage, Therefore God Sets the Rules
Who created marriage? It's not a trick question. You got it. It's God.
God created marriage. Now, if God created marriage, does it not follow that God sets the rules, the parameters by which marriage is to be operated with, by which it is to be functioned within? Well, of course. If God has created marriage, if the institution is derived from His word and His will and His decree, if He has instituted it to begin with, then it makes sense that whatever laws and application and parameters exist for marriage stem from His will.
Now, has He been silent about these things? Not so much. He has been clear right from Genesis through the end of the book. Genesis through Revelation.
You see passage after passage that depicts marriage in the most wonderful of ways. In Genesis, it's depicted as a man joining with a wife, becoming one flesh together. All the way at the end of the book in Revelation, you see what? You see the wedding supper of the Lamb, marriage.
Marriage is esteemed from one end of Scripture to the other. With that said, the world around us likes to test the parameters that God has established in times past. Thinking, perhaps, that those parameters only applied to people a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Thinking that those parameters, that they're not applicable in our current context.
So the world around us likes to test the parameters. Not just the world around us, but the world of Malachi's day as well. From time — to era to era, cultures try to reinvent marriage. They say, okay, God has said such and such, and yet, oh, what I feel in my heart can't be wrong.
There were men of Malachi's day who felt something in their heart, a heart that was deceitfully wicked. Who can know it? But they felt something in their heart, and they pursued the wives of foreign gods.
Syncretism: How Foreign Gods Corrupted the Covenant People
What happened? Well, we already hinted at this before. What happened is this, that as they pursued the wives of foreign gods, the wives brought with them the foreign gods and their doctrines. The idols and the practices came into play in Israel.
Poisoned the well, diluted what they were doing. A foreign spouse would bring foreign beliefs, foreign religions into the household of God's people. Now, we call that syncretism. Syncretism, the joining, the fusion of two disparate things together.
In this case, the fusion of two disparate, contradictory belief systems together. Can anything healthy come out of that? Well, no. And that's what we see in Malachi and elsewhere. When the Israelites married the daughters of foreign nations, the gods of wood and stone entered within.
And this had the effect of lowering the bar in their faith and their practices. Can you think of any examples? Anyone jumped to mind in scripture that did such a thing and was judged for it?
The Warning of Solomon: Wisdom Undone by Foreign Wives
Well, how about Solomon? How about Solomon? Now, you remember Solomon, right? When you think of Solomon, you probably think of two things.
You think that he was wise, Solomon the wise, and he was also rich, he was wealthy, he was also famous, he was powerful. In his day, Solomon had it all. He had the wealth, he had the wisdom, he had the knowledge, he had the esteem, the fame, the power, all of this. Solomon had it all to the infinite degree that a human man probably can have such a thing.
He had it, and yet it wasn't enough. What did he do? He looked out, he saw, he saw the daughters of foreign gods. He saw the political alliances perhaps he could make by marrying the daughters of foreign gods.
And so he did so. And he didn't do so just once or twice or thrice. There was a myriad, a myriad of foreign wives that he had. And the net effect was this: that those wives turned his heart against the Lord.
Solomon, for all his wisdom — the pull on his heartstrings or his libido was too strong. And for all his wisdom, he did what he ought not. And what a terrible epitaph that is to have, to say, as Scripture says, that his heart was turned. He adopted practices, beliefs, or at least he allowed practices and beliefs to go on in the world around him that were absolutely, fundamentally contradictory to what God had said.
It's amazing how fast people become pragmatists instead of theologians. In any case, God doesn't abide with this. The very first of the Ten Commandments, what does it say? Thou shalt have no other gods before me.
It's not buried eight commandments deep. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. And the practices of the people of Malachi's day was to adopt habits and relationships that would put other gods on a pedestal, if not above the God Jehovah, at least on par with Him.
Abomination: God's Verdict on Redefining Marriage
“Judah has dealt treacherously, and an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem, for Judah has profaned the LORD's holy institution which He loves: He has married the daughter of a foreign god.”
— Malachi 2:11 (NKJV)
Verse 11 says that the people ignored what they knew to be true. Verse 11 says Judah has dealt treacherously, not just forgetfully, not just kind of they sort of stumbled here and there into sin. Judah has dealt treacherously, and an abomination has been committed in Israel and Jerusalem. There is no stronger term, no stronger term of judgment in all Scripture than that, abomination.
An abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem, for Judah has profaned the Lord's holy institution, which He loves, in that he has married the daughter of a foreign god. The people did not like the restrictions God had placed upon marriage. God had told them, this is how it operates. This is the parameters.
This is the lanes you drive in. And they said, nope, we're going to do it our way. Why? Because I feel led to.
My heart says such and such. So-and-so is so beautiful. The alliance or relationship we could have with their family would be so great and beneficial. For all sorts of pragmatic reasons, people did what they ought not do.
And God was watching. God was watching. And He looks down on this. He says, this isn't just mere sin.
He says, this is sin in its most extreme form. This is treason, what you're doing. Now, the people didn't see it that way. Understand this.
In their day and in our day, sometimes sin becomes so sugar-coated in the world around us, we don't see it for what it is. In our day, in our day, what do we call it when there's fornication between two couples? We call it having an affair. When Scripture calls something treason, adultery, what do we call it?
An indiscretion. See, our temptation is to always lower the bar and to identify things differently than God does. And yet, He uses the strongest possible language to let us know that this is not the way that it works. We are supposed to have control over our minds, our hearts, and our bodies.
And when we don't do so, again, God is watching. Now, a few moments ago, we asked the question, who created marriage? And we answered, God. I hope at home you got that.
God created marriage. Now, if God created marriage, then again, He sets the rules. If it were the opposite, if man created marriage, then man would be free to amend it, right? Our own constitution, our own government, man sets up rules, and then man amends or changes or what have you.
Well, if God instituted marriage and God sets the rules, they come from a transcendent source. We cannot override God, no matter how or whether we may care to. If marriage was instituted by God, it's He who makes the rules. That's not just theologically sound; that's just common sense.
Which is why it's so amazing and frustrating how marriage is being redefined, even in buildings with crosses up front. If God sets the rules, and He has explained point blank what they are, we're silly and we're sinful to do otherwise. In any case, Malachi's day, much like ours, marriages were being entered into without regards for the rules, without regard for the rules of the one who created an institution to begin with, and the Creator was going to have words with them about this.
The Second Sin: Breaking Covenant with the Wife of Your Youth
“Because the LORD has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant.”
— Malachi 2:14 (NKJV)
Let's see what He says in verses 13 and 14. And this is the second thing you do. So the first thing was God calling the people out about their relationships with the spouses from foreign nations and foreign gods. And then here we have the second thing.
There's a second sin being called out. You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping and crying, so He does not regard your offering anymore, nor receive it from goodwill with your hands. Yet you say, why? For what reason?
Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant. All of these words are fully loaded. All of these words have implications.
All right, the first few verses, God identified the people's first problem. They were marrying outside of the faith. In verses 13 and 14, the second problem emerges in that even when they did marry the right people, even when they did marry other Israelites and the like, even when they did so, even when they married within the covenant community, a concept that is carried into the New Testament when we read that we're not supposed to be yoked to unbelievers.
Even when they did marry fellow Israelites, here's the cruel irony. They were not being faithful to the ones that they married. Even when they married the right people, they broke the covenant with those people. See, God had a problem.
God had a problem with the way that they broke their covenant. The people broke their covenant with him. That's what we saw a few verses ago. He says, I have a problem with the way that you're breaking your covenant with me by allowing what you do in your faith and your practices to be polluted by the daughters of foreign nations, foreign gods.
I have a problem with how you're dealing with the covenant that I have with you. You are being treacherous in this arrangement, treacherous in this agreement. So He says that's a problem. But then He says the second problem you have is that even when you marry rightly, then you break the covenant one with one another.
It's not just you break the covenant with me, but you have covenants that you make with one another, and you break them. You break them. You know, adultery and infidelity, divorce, remarriage, these things cause great pain in our world. They cause great pain in Malachi's day, throughout all the ages.
And verse 13 recognizes that pain. It recognizes not just the sin, mind you, but the pain it causes. When it says this, it says that the wives would come to weep over the altar, so to speak. There would be tears and groaning and wailing over this sinful nature.
Specifically here, the men are largely what's called out. And this picture is that the men were being unfaithful in what they were doing. And that their spouses were wailing out to God out of their hurt and out of their pain. As they were mistreated or abused or disregarded.
And God says, you're doing all that? You're treating the wife you have a covenant with in such a way, and then you've got the gall to come in and offer me a sacrifice and think we're good? I think that takes care of everything? You've got the gall to treat your wife in such and such a way, and you've got the gall to come in and make an offering before me?
He says, I don't want it. It's his equivalent of, you keep it. He says, I don't respect that gift. I will not receive it with goodwill, is what we see in the New King James.
Why not? Why not? Well, again, because God says, I'm a witness to what you've been doing. He says, I'm a witness.
I've seen how unfaithful you've been, even if no one else has. I've heard the cries from the spouses, even if no one else hears them. And my holy heart is impacted, and I will act. I will act.
And again, He calls this, He calls what they're doing treason.
Rings, Vows, and the God Who Witnesses the Covenant
This morning, if you're married here, take a look. I pointed to it earlier. Take a look at your ring. I trust you have.
Well, take a look at it. What does that ring symbolize? Well, the reason we have rings is because they depict for us the covenant that we entered into on that day long ago. Or not that long ago, depending on how long it's been.
But they depict the covenant. We exchange rings as symbolic indicators of our love. Yes, our love for one another. But our faithfulness.
It's a sign of the covenant relationship that we have entered into. That we will be faithful. And there's vows, right? It's not just rings, there's vows.
Through sickness and health, or richer and poorer, better and worse, and the like. We make promises. Promises we don't honor the promises we've made so often. And when we don't, again, God notices.
See, the implication of verse 14 is that He notices. He says this, He says, I have been a witness. Like the three-fold cord we see in Proverbs. A man, a woman, and God who's intertwined and strengthens it.
When that cord is broken through some action or fracture by one of the spouses, God isn't like surprised and He's not indifferent. He's telling them a witness on behalf of the aggrieved and against the guilty. Even if a spouse doesn't know the full measure of one's iniquity, God does. And He doesn't sit idly by while covenants are trampled.
Covenants that oftentimes are made right here in churches before witnesses. He doesn't take this lightly. The Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth with whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant.
Not wife by convenience. Not wife by happenstance. Your wife by a covenant that you willfully entered into. Now I want you to notice the word treacherously has the same prefix as the word treason.
Either of those words, wow, they can sound heavy on our ears. Talk about Scripture being a double-edged sword that strives to division of soul and spirit. When it calls out this sin as treason for some of us, it's like, oh, wow, it's heavy. And again, that's why our culture adopts benign-sounding alternatives.
Scripture calls it treachery. The world calls it an indiscretion. Scripture calls it fornication. The world calls it having an affair.
Scripture says such and such behavior is an abomination. The world says we can take great pride in this. God has one view. He has one view of marriage and its application.
The world has another. And it uses different language and different terms to address it. Which terms have you bought into? Which language?
Which laws? Which parameters? Which precepts? Remember, if the institution comes from man, it can be defined by man.
But if it comes from God, no. Not so much. If it comes from God, we dare not redefine it. And unlike the priests who shrugged and looked the other way in Malachi's day, we can't just wink and pretend it doesn't exist either. We address it.
Call it out.
Why God Hates Divorce Yet Permits It for Infidelity
All right, when a third party — we're going to look at verses 15 and 16 here in a moment. When a union between two spouses is violated, when a third party violates the intimacy of that union, the union, spiritually speaking, it's fractured. It's fractured, and to prove that it is fractured — shattered, even — God has permitted for such a union to be dissolved by something that we call divorce.
Now, does God hate divorce? You better believe it. He hates divorce. But that should tell you how much He hates infidelity and covenant unfaithfulness, that He would permit or even allow divorce under these circumstances.
Let's look at verses 15 and 16. Verse 15: Did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? For He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously. Take heed. Be proactive. Are you letting something into your life that you ought not?
Are you on websites you shouldn't be? You cast looks at people you shouldn't look at? Take heed to your spirit and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one's garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts.
Therefore, take heed to your spirit that you do not deal treacherously. That idea of taking heed occurs twice. This morning, what do you and I need to do to take heed? What possible sin is entered in or is on our radar that ought not be?
What are we doing to take heed?
Marriage as a Sign of Christ's Union with the Church
Let me explain something about the spiritual aspect of marriage. If we're not careful, we can say, okay, God set it up, He set laws, and like a top that He spins, and you just want to see how we do within it. Well, that's not the case here. Marriage has spiritual implications that we have to linger on.
You see, the union between husbands and wives, it's a wonderful thing. As we said, it's a joyous thing. It's a joyous thing for us as individuals, but it's also very important, spiritually speaking, in terms of what it signifies. You see, the union of a husband and a wife was always meant to highlight the union, the marriage, between Jesus Christ and the church.
Between Jesus Christ and the church. See, in Ephesians 5, which Doug read earlier, when the Apostle Paul talks about marriage, he says that when a husband and wife are married, The two, the two become one. They become one flesh. And intimacy, when that occurs, that's a sign of that.
The two becoming one. With that said, in Ephesians 5, something interesting happens. On the one hand, he starts off, he's talking about marriage. He's talking about this wonderful thing where a man and a woman are together.
And they are one. They are one body. They are one flesh, so to speak. With that said, he goes on to say this.
He says, this is a great mystery. But I speak concerning Christ. And the church. You hear that?
One minute you're reading it and you're going, okay, this is marriage 101 here according to the Apostle Paul. And you're seeing what he has to say and the importance of marriage. And all of a sudden he says, aha! He says, but I want you to notice something.
He says, there's a great mystery here. He says, the institution of marriage, for as wonderful and important as it is, you should know this, O reader. You should know this, O church. You should know this, O congregation.
That it points to something even greater than itself. It points to and it signifies something even greater than itself. As a human institution, it points to something spiritual, is what Paul says. He says, it's a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
You know, whenever we talk about the gospel, we're talking about the good news. That God has looked down at a broken and hurting world. And our world is clearly broken and hurting in the present day. He looks down on a broken and hurting world, and He calls out of that sinful, stained, besotted world a bride unto Himself.
A bride that we know of as the church. And He works, Christ works diligently to prepare and clean, sanctify that bride, that she might be holy and radiant in His presence. You have a bride that is the church, and you have a groom that is Jesus Christ. In Revelation, we see that one day that bride is fully cleaned.
One day that bride is fully prepared. There isn't a sin upon her. At that point, we see the great wedding supper of the Lamb. There's a wonderful spiritual implication to the earthly institution of marriage.
And because that's true, when we sin against our spouse, when we break covenant easily, readily, It has far greater implications, spiritually speaking, than we even know. This is a holy institution, not a practical, pragmatic one. How many people enter into marriage just for pragmatic reasons? I don't want to be lonely.
I'd like to have children. That guy's attractive. That gal's attractive. Sometimes we enter into marriage for very practical reasons, but the thing is, those practical reasons can change.
People don't always stay the same. If that's a spoiler alert, I'm sorry, but they don't. People don't always stay the same. I was not this gray when my wife married me, and she tolerates that and more.
We change. We change. Often times for the better, sometimes not so much. But things happen in our lives, and we're called to have a devotedness towards one another in the midst of all this.
Whatever the case is, in our own lives, we can turn and become faithless towards one another when our dynamic changes. Perhaps when a third party enters our life. We can pursue things we ought not pursue. We can treat covenants as, you know, no big thing.
And honestly, the world encourages us to do that. Is there not one parameter of marriage that hasn't been thrown underfoot by the world around us in recent years and decades? Not a one. The world encourages us to do that.
Where has it gotten us? Nowhere we want to be. Nowhere that God wants us to be. God looks at marriage and He says, this is a great institution.
It typifies the love that Jesus has for the church. And because of that, you and I are to keep it holy. Enter into it carefully. Treat the covenant with great reverence.
Even sometimes when our spouse doesn't make it easy. Treat the covenant with reverence.
The Faithful Groom: The Gospel Behind the Covenant
You know, God's love for the church, Christ's love for the church, is infinitely faithful. But imagine for a moment, imagine that it wasn't. Imagine if Christ could fall out of love for the church. Imagine that God only loved you when you're lovable.
Is it not possible that He could fall out of love for you one day or another because you aren't being lovable? Well, yeah, if that's the way He worked, but He doesn't. It would be terrible, it would be scary, it would fill us with dread if God could fall out of love with us when we weren't being lovable enough, when we didn't please Him enough, when we didn't do what we ought to do.
How much anxiety would we have if God could fall out of love with His people, or if His love was a fickle and flighty thing, or if it might change based on our infidelity, which is often spiritually the case? The good news this morning is that God is not fickle. Christ is not fickle.
And even as the church has been faithless in times past, even as the bride has been stained with sin in times past and present, the groom remembers the covenant. And the groom is faithful to uphold it. See, the gospel of Jesus Christ, the gospel, is one where our Savior gave Himself up for His people in spite of who they are, not because of it.
The gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel in which a glorious and radiant groom embraced and sought out a very tainted bride and proceeded then to wipe away all that bride's hurts and fears and sins. To present her as blameless to himself. The gospel of Jesus Christ is about the pursuit of a faithful one, of those who are often faithless.
Of a sacrificial one, for those who are often selfish. Of a covenantal one, for those who often break their covenants. If that's the sort of love that Jesus has for the church — which it is — that should present itself as a model for our love for our spouses, for our relationship to our spouses, even when our spouses make it difficult, as we often must make it difficult, so to speak.
This is a good lesson here in Christ's love for the church and how we are to be sacrificial and faithful no matter what may happen in the world around us. In any case, let me return to verse 16 as we look to wrap up this morning. In verse 16, God says, there's a hatred of divorce, right?
Divorce is bad. Divorce is negative. God does not like divorce. It covers the garments of the one who pursues it in violence.
Divorce is bad. And yet, in verse 16, we see He apparently allows for it under strict, specific circumstances, the most obvious one being the infidelity, the faithlessness of one of the spouses. Do you understand how grievous a sin infidelity is? It's not an indiscretion, and it's not just having an affair.
It's treachery. It's treason. So much so that God identifies it as an acceptable basis for pursuing something that He absolutely abhors, and that's divorce. If He'll permit divorce because of it, how bad a thing must infidelity be?
God's not indifferent. He didn't want people in Malachi's day to be indifferent. He wanted Malachi to tell them the way it is, so they might act accordingly.
Encouragement for the Broken: Repentance, Reconciliation, and Healing
Again, before we close, let me offer some related encouragement from this text. This morning we've touched upon some very difficult issues. And as I said before, I'm sensitive to this because I know that many of us have been impacted personally, either through our own choices, choices of parents, children, loved ones, friends, neighbors, brothers, sisters, and the like.
Most of us can relate to those who have had a broken relationship, a broken marriage, or the like. So let me — let me offer some encouragement, some encouragement, if that's us this morning. In a room of this size, some of us know that pain well. In fact, some of us have been the recipients of scar tissue upon our back from relationships we've had with others — that, that hasn't gone away even as the years have passed.
For others of us — for others of us, we may have been the ones to lay that scar tissue upon someone's back. With that said, although Scripture calls it as it sees it, Scripture calls these things out, there's a reminder that the Gospel is predicated upon possibilities of repentance, forgiveness, sanctification, reconciliation, and a promise that in due time, all of the hurts that these things have caused us will be wiped clean.
The hurt you feel from your own choices or from choices someone else has made, the hurt you may have for being the children of parents, whether it's been abuse, whether it's been brokenness, whether it's been infidelity, the pain you may have from experiencing any of this in person or through loved ones, you will not carry that pain forever.
You will not carry the stain of your own sins forever. Christ even now is washing us clean of these things. Christ even now is calling us out of the world. And this morning, the warning, reminder, and encouragement we have is to consider our marriages, if we indeed are married, to consider marriage as an institution, to see it for what it typifies, and to respect it as such.
To not enter into it wantonly or carelessly, and not to abandon it without scriptural precedent. And as we do so, as we drive within the lanes of Scripture here, as we follow God's rules, if we operate within His parameters, as we do these things with marriage, the church will engender a healing that's greater than we can possibly know.
If the world was to follow suit, a great deal of the hurts and the anger and the animosities that we now have would be redressed. The families and marriages, covenants, upheld with the sort of love and honor that God Himself accords them with. You and I can't be accountable for everything else that goes out in the world around us.
But we are accountable for our decisions. This morning, let the word of God sink into your hearts. Let it cause you to inspect your own relationships, one with one another. To perhaps act differently than you have in times past.
To perhaps guard you from sins in the future. And to honor and respect a covenant that points to the most significant covenant of promise you cling to. The promise that God is calling out a people, a bride for Himself. And on that great day, we will dwell with Him in glory.
Let's pray.
More in The Book Of Malachi
Continue the verse-by-verse series.

